I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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