i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
