How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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