hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
