I heard we made out
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
