1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I just cut my nipple shaving
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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