This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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