New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I'm both gender and math confused
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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