I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
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