I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
