hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize