just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize
