Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
In America we eat man semen.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
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