the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize