come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
