THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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