Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
