She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
