My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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