spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Randomize