why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
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