I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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