I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
