And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
you made out with another girl for some wings
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
