Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
