Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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