I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize