dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
you made out with another girl for some wings
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
