So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Someone signed my nipple.
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