I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
