He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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