neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
May the power of my ass compel you!!
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
