Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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