just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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