I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
