either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
