? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize