Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Randomize