Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
