yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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