Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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