Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
