is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
