can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
