hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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