stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize