hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
