i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
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