I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
