I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
why is half of my head shaved?
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