Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
