OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
