Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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