i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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