Yo dont text me then not text me
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm gonna fight the coyote
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
