Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
